Okay, so I'm walking home from comic book shopping, yeah? The weather's warm, and life and I are on pretty good terms. I stop on a street corner to wait for the light to change, next to this guy with a sign advertising some condo community. The sign looks kinda heavy, it's hot and he's got a full beard going, not to mention probably arthritis, and I'm sure the job doesn't come with a lot of perks, anyway, so I smile at him and he smiles back, and he seems like a nice fella, so when I get across the street to the ice cream van, I decide to get him a cone, too.

I eat my ice cream, waiting for the light to change again, then toddle back across the street and stand next to the guy. He looks at me, and I hand him the ice cream, and he says:

"Thanks, but I'm lactose intolerant."



I don't know how people still expect me to believe in God.